Eating

I have been eating.  Like, crazy eating.  And the most insane part of all that eating is...I've been losing weight.  I have been less regimented over the last three weeks due to some travel, some illness and some Thanksgiving shenanigans.  I have not been tracking my points and I have been making love to chocolate.  Gross?  Too much info?  Well, it's purely a non-sexual relationship, just a love relationship. More like unrequited love.  Anyweigh, I'm down 3.7lbs and this is the most significant loss in a three week period that I've had since I began WW in February.

Two things come to mind when I consider what in the world is happening here.  First, I have been tracking Activity Points and making sure I didn't stop working out.  Excepting for the week when all I could eat was a piece of toast a day due to excessive grossness that I won't even get into, I was at the gym my usual 4-6 days/week. Second, I ate my usual foods, but didn't really write them down.

I am pretty boring with my food.  Usually I have the same breakfast: 1/2 cup Egg Beaters (Store Brand, not the real Egg Beaters) with 28g low fat cheese and three slices of Turkey Bacon.  I have the same lunch: Zero Points Plus Salad with a one or two point dressing.  I have the same snacks: Fage 0 with 1/2 tbs honey and 2tbs PB2, two low fat cheese sticks for three Points and a couple of pieces of fruit.  Dinner: 3-6 oz Fish or chicken or beef, no side dish.  So, I am guessing I may have had days where I went over my points and days where I was under.  (Don't forget the Chocolate love affair) I still earned about 20 to 25 AP during the week.

Since I didn't keep track, I have no way of actually knowing what it was that I was doing.  This really pisses me off since it was successful and I would like to keep repeating it.  But maybe this is the proof that I needed that being so strict with the food wasn't really helping me.  I ate when I was hungry and didn't when I wasn't.  Maybe I haven't been getting enough food since I am sure I was over what I normally ate during the visit to Grandma.  I ate real frikkin bacon people!  More than once.  And I had chocolate.

I HAD CHOCOLATE.  Lots of it, shamelessly.

Every time I went to my meeting/weigh in and I was very nervous because I just knew I was going to gain since I was so off my plan, I would lose.  And the receptionist would say, "Watch out for next week.  That's when it will show up".  It didn't.  It might this coming week since Thanksgiving triggered my carb addiction in a bad way and I am off my usual breakfast and dinner regimen.  (Carbs!  Dressing with sausage and pecans and onions OH MY!  Dinner rolls.  I had two at dinner tonight.)  I don't know.

I throw my hands in the air and surrender to my stupididity.  Thanks inner saboteur for doing something right and then not letting me in on the secret.  'Preciate Cha.

The Hour I Live For

Sometimes I can spend quite a few hours of my day surfing the internet.  I am mainly browsing other people’s weight loss and fitness blogs.  I need my daily inspiration and the comfort I get from knowing that the struggles I go through are the same ones that other people experience.  But the one hour a day that I live for is the one right after work.  I go to boot camp or to a group fitness class and I LIVE.  Feeling the burn, pushing myself and yet side-eyeing everyone else, because I am secretly in competition with all of them.  I feel the most alive in those moments.

Last night was my first BodyPump class.  I have no idea who this Les Mills is, but my new gym has his classes every day.  Since I refuse to go to boot camp in the cold and/or rain, Less Mills is my new boot camp.  I have to say that I was a bit intimidated after peeking into a class one day about a month ago, but I knew that I would love the intensity of that class. 

So I went and I impressed myself with my weight lifting abilities.  I am looking forward to increasing the weights next time.  I am very unfamiliar with kg measurements and I had no idea how much weight I was using.  A woman from my class was very helpful and she was like, “First time?  Try this weight.”  So I was very grateful she helped me out.  I was able to complete all the reps on all the exercises except two.  No surprise here that they were arms.  My upper body strength sucks.  I can do real pushups now, but only 10 reps and two sets max without muscle failure.  I am a wimp in the upper body.

My husband is so funny.  He really has no idea what I am capable of.  I came home last night and told him about the class and he said “you are going to hurt yourself.”  Ha!  I have invited him to join me at boot camp and at the gym and he refuses.  Every time I tell him about my personal best he always tells me I am going to hurt myself.  So silly.  I’d hurt myself more if I didn’t try these things and competed at the Couch Potato Olympics like I used to!  I actually get mad every time I think about all the time I don’t get back that I spent as a couch jockey!

705

18 Minutes.  

That's how long it takes.

Breathing in, breathing out.

Focus inward.  Hush the voices around me.  Breathe.  Remember this is a mind game.  A mental challenge more than a physical one.

Keep the breathing under control.

I begin to feel the burn around 250.  I got this.  Piece of cake.

I am going to beat my own personal record.  400.

More than 400 squats.

I am nervous.  Randall told everyone just before we began the squat challenge that I did 400 last time.  I am glad it gets dark early so I don't have to watch them watching me.  Breathe.

They finish with their sit up challenge.  I am still going.  350.  "You're psycho" one of the newbies yells at me.  Keep going.

400. 425.  "Gilbert, what's your personal record?"  "500", he says.  I got that.

500.  "I'll bet you can get 600", Randall says.

There is no pain, no burn.  Only a slight jelly twinge to my quads and the breathing.  In and out.  Push up challenge comes and goes, and still, I squat.

600.

Count to 100 one more time.

I can do this.  615.  625.  Ignore the jelly legs.  They can hold me up.

645.  Almost half way there.  I am resolved to do this.

689.  Can I push past 700?  Let me see.

699.  700.  701.  Just four more.  BREATHE.

705.  Legs of jelly and the beginnings of a burn that is going to stiffen my legs and make me remember these squats every single time I have to go pee tomorrow.  Since I drink about 2 liters a day, that's a whole lotta pain tomorrow.  Walk it off.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HOLY SHIT 705 FREAKING SQUATS IN A ROW WITHOUT STOPPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!